My War On Germs

Is it Spring yet?

Sickness, be gone!  BE GONE, I say!  …hmm, this isn’t working as well as I thought it would.

I’m stymied as to how the last several weeks have turned green (in a snotty, not Spring-y or environmental-y way).  Are my children licking each other?  I’m seriously considering renaming one child “The Nose”.  Seriously.

I can handle the noses, and the coughs, and the sneezes, wheezes, hacking, fussing, fevers, …you get the picture? … there is one thing I absolutely can’t handle.

What I absolutely can’t stand in this house (or anywhere else for that matter) is the STOMACH FLU.

This last week, the cheeky germ decided to appear despite my sternest warnings that it should not.

[tangent alert]

On this topic, have you ever noticed that kids only seem to throw up in public or at 3:30 in the morning? I’ve always wondered about that … it’s like some twisted flu protocol that throwing up must occur at the worst possible moment for all individuals involved.  Come to think of it, I’m not really aware of a good time, to get the flu, but I still don’t get why it can’t suddenly come upon you at say, 7:30 PM while you happen to in the bathroom already.

I once had the flu onslaught in a moving car …on the way home from a babysitting job … being driven by the person who’d hired me to babysit … True Story. (but I’ll save my gross embarrassments for another post)

[phew, back on track…]

The “stats” on the germ warfare in the Ewoldt household currently include: one trip to the ER for rehydration, 15 gallons of electrolyte-infused beverage (perhaps a slight exaggeration), and so many loads of laundry that I’ve lost count and my washer and I are no longer on speaking terms.

After the typical fashion of my genetic material, I’ve spent most of the week in circles … “Where’s the disinfectant?!”, “Somebody grab the wipes!”, “Can I get more paper towel?” … until yesterday morning, when I had a breakthrough which  must be akin to the discovery of fire or some other equally ground-breaking scientific discovery.

Behold, THE BOX!  Yes, I’m aware that I need a much better name for a survival kit of this magnitude, but at this moment, it alludes me.

Equipped with handles for quick carrying action and stuffed with everything you need in case of a projectile emergency on the part of your two year old (who is currently eschewing the whole “vomit into a receptacle” theory as antiquated and below him), I thought it was so cool, I had to take a picture! Just for you!

I also had to include the picture of my other survival kit. Though not neatly ensconced in a box (candles and boxes not mixing well, etc), this is … what can I say?   Again, just had to help you picture it:

Ah, I’m feeling more relaxed already!


What’s in YOUR household “survival kit”?


  • Mindy

    Hi Ellie! I’ve been reading your amazing blog, just now put you on my blog list so I can catch up!

    Sorry to hear about all the sickness – if it’s any consolation, it’s been a horrible winter of sickness for so many I know.

    Starbucks and computer time and a good book are my coping mechanisms!

    • Ellie

      Thank you, Mindy! I hope to be writing another chapter or two shortly, so stay tuned!

  • Heather

    Awwwww, poor Ewoldt’s!! I hope you are all feeling better quickly. And you are right about children only throwing up in inconvenient places. Ruby has never thrown up, thank goodness, and Jack has thrown up twice: once in the car and once on my friend’s couch.

    • Ellie

      THANK YOU Heather for proving my theory! I think car vomit is probably the worst. Poor Jack. Give your kiddos hugs from their Aunt Ellie and Uncle Bob, okay?